“I like to think my mother’s gift in her Will was her way of thanking the Army Benevolent Fund for the life-changing support they gave to me.”
David Warner’s mother, Miriam Warner, generously chose to leave the Army Benevolent Fund (ABF) a gift in her Will. “She never said anything to me about it,” said David. “I didn’t see my mother’s Will until after she died, and I became the executor. I was delighted that she chose to leave a gift to the ABF. I’m sure I will do the same.”
David is himself a beneficiary of the ABF’s support, after an accident meant he had to leave his Army career behind. “I found myself in civvy street, without the degree I should have got before I joined,” he said. “Being an Army Officer was my ambition, but I needed to choose a new career.”
“I decided to become a barrister like my grandfather, but times were hard and I needed financial support. I applied to the ABF and they couldn’t have been more helpful. I’ve been a barrister for 30 years now, and it wouldn’t have happened without them.”
Miriam was born in 1941, in County Cork. “She comes from a long-established Irish family called McCarthy-Morrogh, ” said David. “She trained as a cordon bleu chef, then she came to England, where she met and married my father. Dad had not long left the Army. He joined when he was 18, and left after 22 years as a Major in the Royal Artillery.”
David’s parents lived in Surrey, later moving to South Wales, where they lived for the last 30 years. “Though she loved everything about the Army, I think Mum was grateful she didn’t have to live the Army life. I don’t think it would have suited her,” David laughed.
“Mum was a passionate person and deeply committed to her family. She was a staunch Catholic throughout her life, with a strong sense of ethics that her father – my grandfather, the barrister – had drilled into her. Mum’s faith kept her going through some very dark times.”
The darkest time of all came when David’s younger sister Jenny was killed in a road accident, aged 15. “Jenny’s death had a profound impact on us all. My parents never got over it, because you don’t, but slowly they began to come to terms with it as life moved on,” said David. “Mum became involved with a charity for bereaved parents, which helped her, and later she helped them.”
David joined the Army aged 19. “I trained at Sandhurst and was a Queen’s Dragoon Guard for three years, but then I broke my ankle very badly playing rugby and had to leave,” he said.
At the time, David’s family were still dealing with the aftermath of his sister Jenny’s death. “Dad was struggling with work and things were falling apart. I loaned my parents some money that was intended for my bar school fees, but sadly things didn’t get better in enough time and I was in danger of losing my place,” said David. “That’s when I turned to the ABF. They are part of the fabric of being in the Army, and I knew they offered support for ex-soldiers.”
“The advice I’d give to other veterans in need of assistance is: don’t be proud. Leaving the Army is difficult and people contribute because they want to help. The ABF is like a crutch or a walking stick… there to support you.”
When Miriam was 55, she set up a care agency in South Wales that now employs over 150 carers. “It’s her greatest work achievement and we were all so proud,” said David. “She built that agency up at a time when most people would be retiring, and it transformed her life. She was able to travel and do all sorts of things she really enjoyed.”
“The circumstances we found ourselves in as a family were unique, but they also demonstrate how the ABF works in terms of delivering life-changing support,” said David. “I was so touched that my mother left a gift, because now that money has come back to help others in need. I know that the Army was very important to my mother, just as it was to my father and to me.”
“Leaving a gift in your Will is a simple thing to do, and you don’t have to leave very much to make a real difference. I know from experience that the ABF will put those funds to good use.”